Tuesday, December 31, 2013

The Chipmunk Saga: New Years Eve Edition

First of all, yes. Its 9:45 on New Years Eve and I am sitting in my PJ's with no bra and no make up, getting ready to watch Netflix before going to bed. (and yes. I am 18). But here is the thing. New Years is one of those planned let downs every year. Its a very romantic idea; when the clocks strikes midnight, the kissing of random people, the ball dropping, the whole world counting down the beginning of a new year, a new beginning- its great. But in reality its anti-climatic and exhausting because you have to stay up. Now, non-Mormons: that makes a little more sense because they can get wasted and have a delightful time. I do have a defense laid out mind you- I have 4 different places I could be tonight and very clear reasons why staying in bed at home is the best option. Option 1: The multi-stake dance. Need I say more? I DESPISE stake dances and the New Years one is particularly bad. The biggest reason; boring. Option 2: This one was the most inviting and I almost went- Kami's crepe party. I even drove by her house but I couldn't convince myself that I would know enough people to make it worth it.Option 3: Hasn't even started- Drake's Post Ball-Drop Waffle Party. This one also is inciting but it STARTS at 12:30 and there is no way I am going to wake up to go to the post party. Option 4: Stacie's house. The reason I am not there is because I would just be asleep on her couch and I would rather do that in my own bed. The overarching reasons for me being so anti-social tonight is because I am on drugs that make me sleepy and dizzy and I have been avoiding mirrors for the past 5 days because my face. Also sleeping all day made me break out and that is less than helpful.
Is there something wrong with me? Isn't that supposed to be a thing? Wanting to stay out on New Years? Experience that magic? It's probably just because I am getting older but this year was severely lacking in all things magical. Christmas snuck up on me because thanksgiving was late and because singers made me so busy. Christmas itself was lacking in magic because I knew what everyone was getting/ giving. And New Years has never been overly magical. So that is why I am home, in my bed, preparing to watch Netflix on New Years Eve. Elisabeth would be so ashamed. Thank goodness she is in UT.
Granted is this just a rant about the injustices of stupid traditions to make myself feel better for being anti-social? Probably

The Chipmunk Cheek Saga Continues

I WANT MY FACE BACK. Work yesterday was fine but I got super dizzy and kind of nauseous and may or may not have fallen asleep in the back room...? Alright work was kind of a fiasco. But it was a super slow night so that was good. I came home and watched some How I Met Your Mother. Pretty much was dying laughing. Elisabeth is totally Barney- stupid, weird, socially unacceptable yet somehow gets laid all the time. Also is always finding something adventurous to do, even if its totally ridiculous. I think I am sorta like Robin and Ted. Not one of them, both. Ted is romantic and quirky but Robin is independent. Jk I have no idea. After that I watched Bones and it happened to be the Christmas episode and I totally cried. WHILE WATCHING BONES. Who am I?? I totally teared up! I again blame this on the medication but this is getting out of hand. There was a really cute little kid though and so that's like, not fair, or something.
This morning I did NOT get to sleep in until kingdom come, Mom woke me up at 8 and made me eggs. So I guess I was ok with the lack of kingdom come. I came down and my parents and I had this 'talk' about my life for the next two years. First of all they are afraid I will have too much time on my hands next semester because realistically I probably wont be able to find another job in time. And then this summer I will go to school and then I will go to fall semester of school and then I will go on a mission. (or more school) Anyway their solution to the too-much-time-on-Holly's-hands is for me to take classes at MCC and I actually think its a really good idea.  The only problem is we decided that today and after being on hold for an hour, I am pretty sure they are closed today. But hey, I think its a good plan. And if by some miracle I get another job or Payless suddenly can give me 30 hours than great! Ill drop out form classes.
I am kind of excited. Going to MCC would give me college credit and be great college prep.

Monday, December 30, 2013

The Chipmunk Cheek Saga

Today it starts. I have to go to work in all of my fat-baby-cheek glory. EW. This is not ok. I AVOID MIRRORS. The inside of my mouth still has stitches! How am I supposed to take my drugs if I am at work?? Plus its embarrassing because my mom has to take me to work because I cant drive because the narcotics make me dizzy. The most terrible thing about this is I have round fatty cheeks anyway so it basically looks like I just gained some weight.
I am so upset about my face and its chipmunk-like qualities I wrote a haiku:

Chipmunk cheeks I have
People will think it is fat
I just want to sleep

Sunday, December 29, 2013

A Graduation Speech That is Worth it

This was something John Green talked about in one of his You Tube video's and I have no life so I actually read it and I was so impressed. I loved it.

http://web.archive.org/web/20080213082423/http://www.marginalia.org/dfw_kenyon_commencement.html

"Learning how to think really means learning how to exercise some control over how and what you think. It means being conscious and aware enough to choose what you pay attention to and to choose how you construct meaning from experience. Because if you cannot exercise this kind of choice in adult life, you will be totally hosed."

"In the day-to day trenches of adult life, there is actually no such thing as atheism. There is no such thing as not worshipping. Everybody worships. The only choice we get is what to worship. If you worship money and things, if they are where you tap real meaning in life, then you will never have enough, never feel you have enough. It's the truth. Worship your body and beauty and sexual allure and you will always feel ugly. And when time and age start showing, you will die a million deaths before they finally grieve you. On one level, we all know this stuff already. It's been codified as myths, proverbs, clichés, epigrams, parables; the skeleton of every great story. The whole trick is keeping the truth up front in daily consciousness.Worship power, you will end up feeling weak and afraid, and you will need ever more power over others to numb you to your own fear. Worship your intellect, being seen as smart, you will end up feeling stupid, a fraud, always on the verge of being found out. But the insidious thing about these forms of worship is not that they're evil or sinful, it's that they're unconscious. They are default settings."


Forrest Gump

I went to sacrament meeting but my drugs made me sleep for most of it. But then I came home and watched

Well Forrest Gump made me cry BUT I AM A TEENAGE GIRL PERPETUALLY EMOTIONALLY UNSTABLE AND I AM TAKING A LOT OF PAIN MEDICATION RIGHT NOW so i have some pretty legitimate excuses. It was a really good slow movie. Tom Hanks is an incredible actor. Jenny was the Princess Bride and that threw me off and one of her boyfriends is named Wesley?? I laughed out loud. I liked the part about Dan's philosophy vs. Mrs. Gump's. I didn't like that Jenny was a tramp but she turned out ok in the end and has an adorable little boy. I kept thinking how out of all the guys she had sex with, she got super lucky that her son was Forrests. All of the little allusions were great too (Apple, Bubba Gump Shrimp, Watergate, Elvis)
There were some pretty good one-liners in this as well (I am a fan if you can't tell.)
"My mamma always said 'Life was like a box of chocolates.You never know what you are going to get'"
"You have to do your best with what God gave you"
"Stupid is as stupid does"
"I don't know if we each have a destiny, or if we're all just floating around accidental-like on a breeze, but I think maybe it's both. Maybe both happening at the same time"
"Mamma always said you could tell an awful lot about a person from their shoes"
"I am not a smart man. But I know what love is"

The Good, The OK and the Terrible

So yesterday I finished up my Netflix watching with Mansfield Park

It was a little racy for a Jane Austen movie so I am suspecting they spiced it up a little. It had a cute ending though and I liked the actress and actor for the main love interest
I started Forrest Gump but I haven't finished it. That is today's plan. Instead last night I watched Red 2 with my pop. It was pretty funny. I was pleased. The first one was better I think but this one was pretty dang good.
 
After that we decided that I had to take meds at 12 so why not stay up and watch another movie to make sure I did? So we watched Pacific Rim and it was SO bad. Oh it was terrible. The casting was weird, the lines were cheesy and stupid, there was a plot but an unimaginative one. I am pretty sure I slept through most of the fighting scenes. IT WAS SO BAD.


Anyway today mom made me get up and shower (something I hadn't done for a while) and get dressed and stuff. I woke up hurting this morning but once the meds kicked in I have been fine. I have progressed into full chipmunk mode and looking in the mirror kinda ruins my mood. So I don''t. I am going to sacrament meeting but I am most definitely sitting in the back. I am quite ready for this wisdom teeth removal thing to be over with.

Saturday, December 28, 2013

The Fault in Our Stars


Funny, fresh, sad, The Fault in Our Stars was great. John Green really is incredible. He is able to tell a love story but add in all this great stuff about living, death, oblivion and existence. I loved it.
John Green really is the king of one-liners
This is probably one of my favorite quotes ever (if you cant tell by the name of this blog). The reason I love it so much is that is how i think; all jumbled up and nonsensical and that's why when my words come out, they often don't make since- I am only then connecting them in my brain. I usually have a rough estimate of what I am going to say but until it comes out they are just stars- half formed thoughts and emotions.
"My thoughts are stars I cant fathom into constellations"
"I fell in love the way you fall asleep; slowly, and then all at once"
"You read a book and it fills you up with this evangelical zeal and you become convinced that the shattered world will never put back together unless and until all living humans read the book"
"That's the thing about pain. It demands to be felt"
"Love is keeping the promise anyways"
"It would be a privilege to have my heart broken by you"
"Some infinities are bigger than others"

Columbine


This book was fascinating. First of all, this was barely in my life time, let alone my memory. I virtually knew nothing about it. It was non-fiction which was different for me. I am much more of a fiction person. This book was disturbing. It kind of freaked me out but honestly, I couldn't put it down. The criminally insane has always fascinated me in a sick kind of way. This book defiantly satisfied that. Eric Harris a psychopath. Dylan Klebold was woefully misguided and suicidal. Both came from two parent homes. Both were bright kids. Both were not bullied or outcasts or goth or anything like that. Eric was a lady killer. Dylan was going to go to U of A in Tucson. The weekend before the shooting they went to Prom.
I highly recommend this book.

Looking For Alaska



This is probably one of my new favorites.
These are my favorite quotes. There were so many.




The Road


This is one of those change-your-perspective-and-therefore-your-life kinda books. I liked it but i cant say i loved it because it was graphic and dark and gave me nightmares. The end made me cry but that's probably because I am a teenage girl in a state of continuous emotional instability. The style was awesome. It was easy to read but the vocab was advanced- there was a word to look up on nearly every page. The imagery is disturbing but the themes explored were fascinating. The love between a father and son. Survival. Murder vs. self-defense. How people change in the face of constant terror. Humanity. What that even means. It made you think of what you would do in this post-apocalyptic world. Really its a love story between a father and son.

Wisdom Teeth Removal Sucks

I woke up at 3 today. PM. Can I get a 'pathetic!' ?? But its ok because I have chipmunk cheeks and am highly medicated right? right. I have also not eaten anything but mashed potato's, jello, yogurt, applesause and drugs for the past 24 hours. Yesterday I watched like  5 hours of netflix
Good stuff man. Trevon came over and watched it with me. What a party. Today I made a huge step and watched my first R rated movie
The problem with this of course is that it was fantastic. Seriously so good.
"We are all pretty bizarre. Some of us are just better at hiding it than others"
"Spend a little more time trying to make something of yourself and a little less time trying to impress people"

Next on the rated R list? Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind.